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20 Ways To Keep The Romance Burning In Any Relationship

I’ve been married for over 10 years. I actually cannot believe it. The other day, Bill and I were joking around and he noted that we’ve known one another for just about 15 years. Wow – when did I get so old???

Anyway, like every couple, the romance has sort of slowed down. It’s part of life – I get that. I’m not asking to be courted like when we first met (even though that would be awesome). I’m just asking to not be taken for granted and I think that many women out there feel the same way. SO – I’ve put together this quick little list (just in case you want to forward it along to your man).

Love is a work in progress, right? A long term relationship needs a little TLC every now and then. Bill and I are good about keeping our relationship a priority but we are always up for some advice. Have any tips? Leave them in the comment section below.

romance tips for relationships

20 Ways To Keep The Romance Burning In Any Relationship

  1. PDA. I’m not saying over the top PDA… but a little smooch in public goes a long way.
  2. The 4 letter word. LOVE. When was the last time you said “I love you” to your partner for no reason? Think about it.
  3. Date Night: We were so good about date night for a really long time – then it died down. Need to get this back in action! Schedule alone time once a week and go see a movie. Don’t have the funds to do something like that? Then head to the library or Barnes and Nobles. Anything counts.
  4. Stop taking things for granted. Yes, your wife cleans and cooks. Every time you come home – the bed is made. Little fairies don’t do that. She does! Appreciate the little things even though they are common.
  5. Dance a little: We do this with our kids. We turn our iPods on and everyone dances in the kitchen together. But then Bill and I eventually get together and dance. We’re too old to go clubbing anymore and everyone we know is married – so those dancing opportunities are long gone. Make up your own.
  6. Dance for him: Just a thought ladies… but I’m sure he would appreciate a private dance.
  7. What about gifts: When I was still in college and dating Bill neither one of us had a lot of money. One day he made me a rose out of loose leaf paper. I will NEVER forget that because I thought it was the most adorable / romantic thing. Nowadays, when he comes home with my drink from Starbucks without being prompted I get that same feeling.  I am not a jewelry, flower, chocolate kinda girl. I don’t want anything expensive. I just want to feel like my husband knows me.
  8. A little something underneath (or not): Have a little fun. Wear sexy panties or no panties at all. Let your husband know what’s going on and then have him wait all night until the kids go to sleep. In that same vein – throw away all your “grandma panties” (no offense grandmas – but you know what I mean).
  9. Turn the TV off: So many friends of mine complain that their husbands come home and turn on the sports channel. Then they spend the entire evening not speaking to one another.  Communication is key to any healthy relationship.
  10. Stop living through the motions: This is your life. Stop being on auto-pilot. You are blessed to be healthy – appreciate every moment with your spouse. Vocalize that notion.
  11. Eat together (again with the TV off): Dinner time is family time. We talk about our day without interference. Keeps us in synch.
  12. Leave notes: text messages, post it notes, napkins – whatever!!
  13. Take care of yourself: The best way you can show that you appreciate your spouse is to take care of yourself.
  14. When watching TV – get close: For a really long time, my husband and I used to sit on different couches while watching TV. Then we realized we were half a room apart! So silly. Get close and enjoy one another.
  15. Play a game or two: Whenever you are alone in an elevator make out hard. If he does the dishes – flash him. Whatever! Make it up as you go along. But believe me -the two of you will really start to look forward to whatever situation you mark. 😉
  16. Compliment one another:  My husband still needs a little help here. The only time I get a compliment from him is if we are going to a GALA and I am completely decked out. How often is that???? Otherwise, I could hold my breath until I am blue before hearing one from Bill. This is important.
  17. Take a bath/ shower together: I can guarantee this happened often when you were dating. Not so much after kids, right? Put it on the calendar if need be.
  18. Get campy: I know traditional romance focuses on red roses and candle lite dinners. If that’s where you need to start – then go there. Whatever works. Not everyone is ridiculously creative.
  19. Memory Keeper: Make a photo book of all the fun times you had in your life together. Put it on your coffee table. Kids don’t have to be involved in this – make it about the two of you. Sometimes we just need a reminder.
  20. Use your imagination: Enough said. This is your life. Make the most of it.

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Allison is a designer and writer who currently resides in New York City.

Comments

  1. Great tips! It’s so easy to grow complacent, but I don’t want to ever be like “just roommates”, ya know?

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